Marriage And Money Challenges. Experts agree that finances can be the number one cause of marital strain. It’s understandable that financial struggles can cause strain because how people spend money is never just about the money — it reveals attitudes about what you value most; it reveals deeper character issues. These are some of the reasons blending financial habits can be very challenging.
Marriage can be what a couple decides it can be, there’s always the notion of differences in marriage for example in marriage one spouse can be a saver and the other one a spender, or maybe both spouses are savers, maybe both are spenders! Whatever the case may be There is hope! In this post, our goal is to provide great ideas to help you and your spouse make your marriage stronger by tackling the issue of money management in marriage.
MONEY MANAGEMENT STYLES A HUGE PIECE OF THE PUZZLE IS THE DIFERENCE IN MONEY MANAGEMENT STYLES.
It’s easy to forget that marriage is a commitment to forge a new life with another person. The lack of trust emerging from society has created prenuptial agreements and separate bank accounts in many marriages. These undermine the commitment to a shared life with a spouse and are contrary to biblical teachings. In marriage is not his money or her money. It is our money. Whenever financial issues begin to get out of hand in a marriage, the first thing to do is to pray about them. And in fact prayer should be a style of living we’re not getting into a sermon here but, life in marriage is easier when there is prayer involve. My husband and I pray about pretty much everything, specially when we are talking money and there is decision making involve. When we have to use money for something that’s not in our budget, we both pray overnight and by morning the next day we both are ready to make a move. Weather we decided to use our money or not. There is no substitute for God’s answer though. If prayer, time, and communication cannot help you then you might need help from a marriage counselor, which is usually recommended even before your marriage life begins. My husband and I went for counseling with my pastor before our marriage, he asked some great questions, gave us some great examples and advices that we still live by even to this day. So, don’t think that you only need a counselor when there’s a problem no, it is a blessing and a great idea to see one even before your life journey together begins. Find a counselor who is trained to help couples resolve issues diplomatically. The difference in money management styles:
1. The Morphostatic Style. These are people oriented to the present. They buy what they want now and don’t wait for a sale or even evaluate whether particular purchase is necessary. The Morphostatic style have inflexible standards—they simply want the best. They also tend to be fairly conventional in their buying and planning, operating by a set of rules it is the way they’ve always done it and as far as they’re concerned it is they way it’s going to be.
2. The Morphogenic Style, These are flexible people, wanting as many people as possible involved in the purchasing process. A Morphogenic person usually considers all of the possible consequences involved in a particular decision and takes considerable time to reach a conclusion. What happens when these different types marry? It isn’t hard to imagine some of the fights that could develop around financial issues.
Kim is tired, . She had no idea Tony mismanaged his money carelessly, he brought that behavior with him into their marriage. The debt, from student loans, to credit card, car note, and now his sport events. She didn’t know his needs and desires in marriage would be such a challenge. She and her husband had overcome many challenges, but their greatest ongoing problems surrounded money. Her spouse was a spender, she was a saver; she liked to balance the checkbook to the last penny, her husband hadn’t entered anything in the register in years. The result was numerous volatile eruptions and conflict that both she and her spouse wanted to avoid. It shouldn’t have been a surprise. Had they communicated and have a budget committee meeting monthly. The good is, they’re now taking the time to sit down and like we said before there is hope. Read budgets read budgets you may also want to read emergency fundsemergency funds plus our bonus FREE Online ClassesFREE Online Classes
Budget Committee Meeting Dave Ramsey THE SECOND PIECE TO THE PUZZLE LEARNING TO COMMUNICATE.
The concept of a budget committee meeting comes from Dave Ramsey, the goal is that both spouses put their differences aside and adopt a new set of values to improve and benefit their money management skills and marriage relationship. when couples learn to agree on their money and are determined not to let it drive them apart, they form a unity that is crucial for a successful marriage. The challenge in a marriage is to work through the different identities, ideals and values you each bring to the relationship. You win at marriage by losing your need to get your way in every battle. You get a happy marriage by giving up selfish desires in order to win together—you create shared visions and goals out of your own individual goals! The budget committee meeting also indicates that both spouses will share mutual interest towards their money therefore they both will value and respect each others input and ideas. t’s important that both spouses be involved with creating the monthly budget. The partner with the natural gift can prepare the budget, but the decision-making must be done by both of you. When you sit down with your spouse to have a budget committee meeting, there are three rules that each of you must follow. Rules for the nerd :Listen take input Keep it brief rules for the free spirit: Show up give input be realistic. Remember that opposites tend to attract in marriage, so work together for maximum wisdom. When you have a budget that reflects both of your goals and ideals, you will experience fabulous unity in your marriage. Dave’s powerful class, Financial Peace University, we highly recommend it is perfect for couples to strengthen their communication about money—even if they’re not in debt. Dave even focuses an entire lesson on how we relate with money in different ways. My husband and I have been through FPU it is a great tool that teaches you how to be better stewards of God’s blessings and how to handle money God’s way. When You Sit To Talk About Money:
• FIND COMMON GROUND Be willing to show empathy, be understandable, open minded and none judgmental or critical about your spouse or what happen in the past. You’re starting a new chapter in your lives you both should be willing to look forward to what’s ahead a what the future holds in store for you as a married couple.
• MAKE TIME TO TALK Don’t wait until your credit card is way over the limit and the ridiculous interest percentages blow over the roof or another hot financial issue happens to bring up the subject. The goal is to have a calm relaxed discussion when there’s no particular money issue at hand.
• TALK ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS Volunteer your own feelings about a financial issue men often have the inner pressure to be the providers at home, and the only thing they expect from their wife is respect. As a woman know how to talk to your husband with respect but also have or seek the wisdom and honestly share your hearth and how you truly feel with your husband and encourage him to do the same.
Women are often seeking a sense of security. I cannot describe in words, there isn’t enough words to express how I feel about not having enough to cover basic things. Money isn’t everything for a woman, but not having it can be a very stressful situation. When you get your money at the end of the month and are ready to work on the next month budget we suggest you first give God what is his, pay your tithes and use a percentage of your money to pay yourself before you pay anyone else. If paying yourself 10% of your income at first is too much, choose a reasonable percentage but do it, pay yourself first and get in that habit. After you have give God his portion and you have pay yourself cover your four walls. (Housing, food, utilities, and transportation) after you took care of your family needs pay everyone else. If you are deep in debt or maybe just in debt period follow our recommended debt pay off method check our website www.redtogreeneconomy.com for more information.
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Yadira Lino Castro Financial Wellness Consultant www.redtogreeneconomy.com You Can Find Us Here: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ylino Instagram: @lala_ag Pinterest: @yadiz08 WordPress: @yadiz08 Skype: @yadiz08_1 Linkedin: Yadira Blessed Lino Castro Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/user/godsweetgirl